This is where i belong

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE, back from cruise not long only(:
shall update the trip anther day, too long.haha

SATURDAY,28th July 2007
suppose to go out with jz & sw for kbox & steamboat today, but both of them were too sick to come out.haha!
i went to bmw showroom with mark, his mom & grandparents.
and hohoho, my car.LOL!
in my dream=D

after that,went to suntec, & had lunch with his gramps(:

managed to take one or two photo og Singapore's up-coming Ferry's Wheel. It's magnificantly beautiful(: after the lunch, we dropped his gramps nearby their house's church & left to bugis find celes & hongzhi.

celest was doing her car's seats, putting hello kitty covers, darn nice lahh. Then we went to a famous Duck rice stall nearby the Icons, had our dinner & celest brought us to eat Mango Dessert. We all love mango desserts, especially the one at Lido, but it was closed down vry long ago ): and oh! i saw yanni,persis & gang while eating the dessert. Really a long time since i last hanged out with them, miss you girls.

after the desserts, we went to boat quay, met up with hz's friends. Got 3 or 4 girls were there too, & guess what they're either of my age or younger than me. But they dressed up way more matured than me, & they can even hold liquor. What makes me wonder is, why they even hang out with those guys around the age of mid 20s?

Celest,Mark & I didn't drink at all (: we were so indulged in singing KTV,haha. & there was a pool tournament too. One guy got drunk, because of Zhiqiang i think.HAHAH! was darn funny, he vomitted on the floor, & even clean his own vomit. The bar girls got so mad & annoyed, they were scared of him too.HAHAHHAHA!

SUNDAY 29july2007

i put joleen & yanwen aeroplane today. was suppose to go out with that two girls & xiaowei, but i went to meet darling & Jz instead. sorry girls, drinks on me another time(: promise.
so the 3 of us went to kbox, & the hilarious part was JZ was forced to wear the sarong,& i insisted a pose & snap.LOL! he said " better don't post on blog, or no more friends" but i don't care:p I know he will get mad & complained,but i know HE CAN'T BEAR TO BE NO FRIENDS WITH ME (: thanks ah kor, for cheering the 2 of us up(:

don't let you pai seh alone, i also wear & post lahh.ahhaha
we sang quite little because of our sore throat & all.so we left to tpy red cirle & awaited for perry's arrival.haha.

CAMWHORE!!!!

I HATED BEING SQUASHED!!

We camwhored in the public, hahaha.
really many eyes were on us.
had our dinner at BAnquet & went to play a round of pool at CRC.
long time since i went there to play.haha.
after that, Perry bro left us.
Initially we wanted to go Darlin's house downstairs to find the kids,
but we changed our mind by heading to Roof Garden instead.
The playground, where the 4 of us sat down & talked.
this time it's just the 3 of us.
we had a really nice & comfortable talk.
mark,celest & hz came to pick me later,
& we went all the way to Bedok to eat=.=
perry bro, rmbr the day we went to roof top? (:
you shared with me your secrets & we talked so much,
i'll never forget that day,never will
i wish there'll be another time.i'm sorry for neglecting you.
but thanks for letting us know how you feel (:

SUNDAY 30thjuly2007
didn't go out today, spent whole day with family.
Mom bought me lunch & my favourite bubble tea(: nicenice
later at night, we went to yanni's house.
xavier lucas,zazevalle & levalle were there too.
my four nephews & nieces.
anni & yanni were busy studying, so i played with those two lil' naughty monkeys.

LUCAS (The younger one)

XAVIER TANNNNN

he got my trademark cuckoo face.hahha!

you can't see his eyes, even though they're BIG.

can you believe this naughty boy actually said " i can't take it anymore, i wantto take photo of your mole" to anni when he was using my handphone to take photos.LOL! how cheeky of him!!

but he always cheer me up, they're like my " KAI XIN GUO"

didn't manage to snap a photo or two of lavalle & zazevalle. They went home early.other. yepp, that's all my dearest. i had a wonderful weekends(:

gonna meet up with nyp cliques this week, & also vina!& also espall & jojo. those two nuts (: really miss them truck loads.

Jiaying's happy, but she still need her friends to be happier.

she's happy with them.

please don't go away, friends

stay with me, or hold me along.

smile & laugh with me=)

Ms SUNSHINE*xiiaojia

though these are all past, but you don't know how much i wish to know.
though the truth hurts, but i'm willingly to take the pain.
because all i want to know is the truth
but you always hide from me, until i confront you.
even if i ask you, you'll just say "i've forgotten", or just push the blame away from you
you got everything to cover yourself, every way to escape
or just those sweet talks,hugs & " lets not talk about it" words.
that's how im ended this way,
thinking otherwise every minute & everyday,
crying to myself when i think of the days.
and that's why i never tell you what's in my mind,
because i know its useless now.
you won't speak, you won't tell,
so what's the point of saying how i felt?
there's no trust, but too much love,
for this relationship that i've to serve.
i don't know how long i can hold on,
because everything isn't the same as before.
we're all grown up, especially you.
thinking & all have changed.
but memories don't, everything is etached in my heart.
history will repeat itself, i know
that's why i never let myself walk into my dream again.
" give me one last chance", you asked
noo, i won't
i rather put this hope down, of trusting you.
i rather be prepared,
because i know, thing won't last.
there's no such thing as forever.
but silly me, i still love you from the bottom of my heart (:
no matter how bad it hurts.

How it goes on <3>

Yrays of light shine and i bade goodbye;
~~1:10 AM~~

Monday, July 30, 2007

was blog hopping just now, & i hopped into Perry's blog.
one of his post shot me thru', sank my heart deep down into the sea.

life kinda sucks when you have moved on..
and the ppl around you have not...
You miss the times u were a part of them..
now u're apart from them...

It hurts to know i can go back
and it hurts even more to knw i can't..
cause i've grown out of them..
yet i miss the times so much...

Guess it'll never be the same..
because i dun need them anymore..
in fact i've grown to distaste them..
this feeling i loathe..

i'm sorry my dearest, but i've grown up
i do hope u all have too..
but i've sailed far ahead of you all..
i've lost u all in the fog..

I can't stop to wait for you all..
i have to keep up wit the rest..
yet the memories play on..
Crystal quality with no audio support
only music from my memories..

Jia Ying, Jing Zhi, Shamine
i dun feel connected to you all anymore..
i apologize yet i dun know why..
it seems i'm not able to "feel" you all anymore in my heart

its not that i dun love you all the same..
its jus that, i dun feel the connection of family with u all anymore...
I hate it I hate it I hate it

hope to see you all soon...
soon not as in a few years time..
cause thats what my gut feeling is telling me..
I DO HOPE ITS WRONG!

-ppy-

i have to agree to this post, & i can't deny that we're all drifting far apart.
i really do miss my family, all my brothers & sisters.
those days during secondary, so lively & carefree
now, we're all indulged in our own things, school & work.

actually, i'm the one to be blamed
i had a nice chat with jz & sw ytd.
i've to agree to darling's words, i did regret for being in a r/s with him, & ended feeling so wasted of losing this friendship.
we were once very close brother & sister, nvr afraid of confronting or doing silly things infront of each other.
always arguing over stupid things, & fighting in the public playfully.
he's once my closest brother, my best guy friend, one whom i knew since sec 2.
but because of one silly mistake that turned this friendship into a dreadful misery.
just 2 words " break-up" that caused us two apart into2 different road,both filled with hatreds & regrets.
i know even if we're back together as friends again, there's nothing compared to the past.
there will still be some awkward-ness & un-easiness.
that's the biggest mistake i've made.
we just need times to heal all these.
i'm sorry, aylmer kor, sincerely sorry

Perry bro, please don't give up on this family,
i believe everyone's trying to hold on.
trust this friendship, trust this family, please trust us.

you people are the ones that made me understand what's true friendship.

like flowers blossomed from those seeds.

without you, there'd be no sun in my sky,

there'd be no love in my life.

there'd be no world left for me.

i can't imagine those days without you guys,

those secondary school days.

You and I, brother and sister of nature,

Brother and sister of heaven and earth,

are always there to share the calmness & tears.

don't go without bidding good-bye, not just yet.

for i'll never leave your back.

Growing away from friends is one of the hardest parts of growing up... mostly because it's our own fault for losing touch with each other.

friendship between teens isn't any different than friendship at any other time in our life. Still, adolescence is a tumultuous time, and teens often rely on their friends to be the only ones in the world that seem to understand them. And that can only serve to strengthen an already powerful bond.

Graduation(editted lyrics (: )

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives,

Where we're gonna be when we turn 25.

I keep thinking times will never change,Keep on thinking things will always be the same.

But when we leave this year we won't be coming back,No more hanging out because were on a different track.

And if you got something that you need to say,You better say it right now because you don't have another day.

Because we're moving on and we cant slow down.

These memories are playing like a film without sound.

And I keep thinking of that night in Prom,I didn't know much of love but it came too soon.

And there was me and you and well we got real blue,

Stay at home talking on the telephone, with me,

We'd get so excited and we'd get so scared,

Laughing at ourselves thinking life's not fair.And this is how it feels.

As we go on,We remember, All the times we, Had together,

And as our lives change,From what ever,

We will still be Friends Forever.

So if we get the big jobs and we make the big money,

When we look back now will our jokes still be funny?

Will we still remember everything we learned in school,

Still be trying to break every single rule?

Will that fat jingzhi be a skinny man?

Can Espall be the next big thing with her tan?I keep, keep thinking that it's not goodbye,Keep on thinking its our time to fly,

And this is how it feels.

guys, i miss you people ):

promise you guys won't go.

Yrays of light shine and i bade goodbye;
~~6:16 PM~~

Monday, July 23, 2007

21st july 2007

taka had a car roadshow, so mark & i went over to see(:
we met celest,hongzhi, & auntie later on.
hahaha,auntie was there to see the cars with us,LOL
look at this cool built-in car sound system, cool huh?
guess how much it cost?

$16000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

awhile 7 plus, mark told me he made an appointment so we had to leave. he even asked me to close my eyes while we take me over from taka to the place he wanted to bring me go. I did, but i nearly fell.HAHA so i refused to close again. yepp, he brought me to Meritus Mandarin Hotel. ermm.please don't think dirty. we went all the way up to 38 story, omg, the view was beautiful. Then the waitress led us to upstairs, till then i realised its the "Top Of The M restaurant", Singapore's highest revolving French cuisine restaurant. The place was kinda dark, only had dim light & candles around. Many were caucasians & couples. THe ambience was sweet & romantic, so quiet!! and i was like darn "SUA KU" hahah!

okays, when we were led to our seats, there's a bouquet of flower on the table
how sweet (:

the menu

mark's appetizer & main course

Mine(: okays, its effing delicious!!

desert time, the mango sorbet is SWEEETTtt!!

that silly boy, got the musicians to sing " Nothing' gonna change my love for you", our all time favourite song.Then suddenly they started singing Happy birthday, & a waitor from behind brought a cake to me. LOL, they thought it was my brithday. i was laughing & kinda embarassed too lahh. Actually, mark planned everything in advance. He told them to prepare a cake with " happy anniversary written on it, not "happy birthday".but think they heard wrongly.hahahha! it was darn hilarous.

me and my " Birthday cake"

ayye, you guys must be wondering why these dinner and all. Its 21st july, we broke up on this very date, last year. Yes, it has been one year, and on this very day, he planned this dinner for a real long time,just to ask me for patch.

I did(: i have to admit for this 1 year,i never imagine that we'll be back together again. Many things have happened for this 1 year, experiences & all. Those that know what happened in during this 1 year, why the break & all, you guys may think i'm the silliest girl, to actually patch with him. Yes, i maybe the silliest girl, but im the happiest girl now. I love him, i want to him,myself & this relationship another chance. Losing him in the first place is actually an advantage, i realised his significance to me, his importance. And also those " unfortunate incidents" that i learnt to know from some people, got to know few things that hurt me badly.But i still chose to go back with him despite all, maybe im just blinded love(:

to those that have comments or anything, please keep it to yourself & wish me happiness.

I'm really happy now, i may regret in the future i don't care, but i'm staying firm in my position.

thank you

since 12sept 2003, i love you.

22rd july2007

suppose to meet espall & chenxiaowei today with darling today.

but espall mei couldnt make it, and missychen was un-contactable,MIA

wondering what's happening to her,

girl if you see my blog, please drop us a msg(:

and today's lavelle,my cute little niece, birthday.
but i didn't attend her birthday party ): cause i decided to keep darling accompanied.
so yepp, met her at tpy at 3,headed to town
Initially wanted to catch a movie, but none of the movies captured our interests, & wanted to eat pastamania was put aside when we decided to check out the Kbox Price
$23 per person, & steady, hahah!

SINGING session., me & darling, oh my god!
can you imagine? 2 of us acutlaly selected songs till out of space! haha!
we really enjoyed ourselves, & also we did something real stupid.
we recorded our singing for " Ji De" hahah! as if we're in the concert.
i wanted to put on my blog, but sad to say, i can't open the file.hahahha!
nevermind, save some embarassment.LOL!

CAMWHORE!!

my darling likes to act cute,hahah!
try acting cute again! i'll kick you! ARBISHHHH!!

but i still love her dearly(:

why? cause she's my darling. she holds the most important position, even higher than him.LOL

she's gonna be so happy to see this, and he's gonna be so mad.HAHAHA

candid lahhhh.lols!

IM SINGING!!!!!!! sorry you can't hear.haha!

while darling's singing., i camwhore.haha! =x

we sang till 715.hahah! more than 3 hours of singing.LOL! this time, the kbox session was tolly' FUN!

at tpy mrt, while waiting for train to Bishan.'

we're so "bo liao" lahh.lols! went to Bishan Library, find Jz kor & his friends.lols!

we disturbed jz till he can hide his head somewhere.LOL! around 9, darling had to go. so yepp we went on seperate ways. I wanted to take cab home, because xavier & lucas were at my house! but the taxi queue was darn longgg!! i called him & complained. He actually came out of camp to just fetched me home. i feel soooo bad :p

yepp those two adorables were at my house, watching cartoons.haha!

but poor lucas are having fever, so he laid on my lap. i just can't resist them.

feel so bad for not spending as mch time as before with them.

remember i would always find them every saturday,

now i see them like once fortnightly, or even once a month.

well, at least i managed to spend some time with these 2 babies for awhile(;

Darling, i know you're a strong girl now. Without him,you still have me, you know it.

Its gonna be 5 years, & our friendship is still as strong as ever.

You know you still stay in that position in my heart, & your significance to me.

I will not walk away, never, so don't doubt my words.

just remember, no same dates & marriages for besties.HAHAHAH! you know what i mean.

yes girl, you're my everything(:

I may not be loving my life fully yet now, but i'm still the happiest girl(:
i just need to spend more time with my parents now, i'm kinda neglecting them.
sorry mummy daddy(: i love you too.

Yrays of light shine and i bade goodbye;
~~2:50 AM~~