Sunday, April 29, 2007
im home:) yes; im late home this time
once in a blue moon:) haha; i didn't bother about the curfew given by my daddy
anyway; i did call him up & tell him;)
being an understanding Dad; he lets me;thanks daddy
right; went study with jz & ayl today near FTPSS's study corner
long time didn't have that "feel" studying there
lots of memories; laughters tears & fun
most importantly; the times i had with my sec school friends:)
we studied till around 7 i think; and walked to safra to play snooker
its just like Os period; really
study & play:) but this time round; im more serious in my studies
MUCH MORE SERIOUS; i would say; haha
had two games of snooker; then we walked over to interchange meet kts & jason
i bumped into Jay!! ohmygawd; i miss her loads!
the best maid ever; so good that i don't even see her as a maid; but as a friend of mine
she's the best friend of my dearest sister; espall kaur
and i know her since sec 2; went to espall house almost everyday during sec 2;
know so much about her; play so much with her & spent so much time with just the both of them:)
i miss the both of them
okaye; then we went ct's house to borrow blade again
and the mom's soo cute; haha always chatty & friendly:)
then we bladed to find my darling; chatted awhile at the plaground & we went back to jz's voiddeck
yepp; till around 2; i cabbed home
mom & dad were worried sick
To perry;
bro, the thought of you being angry or not is hindering me.
i sent you that message two days ago; but not even a reply from you:(
aylmer said you out of a sudden said had something urgent;
i hope nothing bad happen; if there's nothing
i also hope you wouldn't ignore me
please reply me; im worried sick
To Jingzhi;
Kor; i know you're not happy; in fact; you're troubled
i can see from your face; i can see you inside out.
these few months you're no longer that happy kor i know
though you laugh & seems happier now; but i know deep inside you're feeling bad & down
" somethings no one can help; only times can" thats what you said;
yes its true; we need time to heal the pain;
all i can do are to only accompany you; be there for you; cry & laugh with you
and that's why i sat down with you today & cried with you;that's all i can do; isn't it?
i need you to be there for me; really
you're like my real-blood brother; always there for me
honestly; you've done your part as a kor; so close to me
that even while blading; i need you to be beside me; to guide & lead me
you're my best brother; i can't afford to lose you
To Espall;
Mei arghhh; please manage your time properly kaye?
don't stress yourself lah.
cca; studies & band??
get all scheduled yeah? don't neglect your studies friends & family
and of course ME ME ME!! hahaha
remember to meet up every wednesday aye!:) for a lunch is fine with me too<3
loves loves loves!
To darling;
aye; i see you almost everyday
hahah; i still love you as much!
that's why i need to see you everyday
a dose of you is a sugar to me;
HAHAHHAHHA!!! how romantic of me eh:)
To parents;
sorry mummy & daddy; sorry for keeping you worry for me
yes i know; im the only daughter; like a gem to you
its not that i don't like to tell you my problems
you know you daughter; she doesn't like pouring out her problems
she always bottle inside her & also don't wanna worry you
you know how much i miss spending time with you?
but studies are really driving me crazy; i want soo much to do you proud
you've raised me for going 17 years; gone thru' all torments & hardworks; overcomed so many obstacles just to provide me with everything; my expenditures & everything.
i want to give them all back to you; not to repay; but to shower what you've given me back to you
you always tell me how your lives are not as good as mine.
yes; you two have gone thru' a hard childhood; living in poverty with many siblings.
but daddy; you didn't fail to work hard and fufilled gramps' dream of entering SG's university & walked out with a Degree
your determinations has inspired me; and i want to be like you
and do you proud.
the money you've spent on me are countless;
i admit im a spendthrift; now im saving & hope that i will get a job real soon
but of course; after i get my studies & all settled down
believe me; trust me; your daughter will try her very best to succeed
to bring out the best of her; & build a brighter future for her & of course you:)
thank you mom & daddy; i love yous(:
sorry for being such a spoiltbrat & rebellious daughter
im sincerely sorry for not being understanding & demanding at times
To stupid;
i know you said before " its need time to numb the pain; not heal":)
hope you're doing fine; study hard aye
sorry; take care
To grandma;
I miss you granny; i really do
so much i want to say; so much i want to see you; so much i want to hug you
loneliness without you is painful;
but im growing up now; more independent i would say
do takecare:)
To cousins;
hey! you guys are missed!
i got sooo much to say; but just can't contact you guys:(
To you;
don't feel bad if you've neglected me
because i myself did neglect you
its so hard to balance everything, friends of diff schools & groups; family; studies
and to you its worse, friends,family,studies,and also cca.
i won't blame you really; just concentrate on your studies and strive for your dream; Scholarship
i have faith in you:)
thanks for holding me soo tight when i cry;
having so many obstacles to go thru'; to overcome these ocean of pain & pursue our dreams:)
i hope we can together with jz & all
our family; 10 members:)
all so important to me; loves loves
aye; im getting all sentimental only
always get "emo" when comes to these kinda things; sad & moody
haha, getting rather pissed with my mood too
ohoh; i still have projects to do! ohmygawd!
i just rmbr shiat! presentation on monday; lalalalala*
personal developement! right; i gotta turn in now;
im dead tired:) okaye; bathe & sleep
nights my fellow readers!<3
Yrays of light shine and i bade goodbye;
2:55 AM
